It Could Work

Today was a great day.  Mark is working nights, but able to sleep some at the hospital so we have some time to play during the day.  We decided to go to the zoo.  While we were there Twister told us he had to go potty and didn't have an accident before I was able to take him to the restroom.  I told Mark, "Do you realize all of our children are potty trained?"  He had a look of relief and gratitude on his face and told me it was a wonderful thing.

While we were at the zoo Master I kept holding Twister up to see things and trying to make the day fun for him.  I felt so grateful to have him be focused on making the day fun for his younger siblings.  My oldest brother was that way.

 Recently I have reflected on how wonderful my oldest brother Mike was to me.  We have uniquely strong sibling relationships in our family and I started to realize he was probably a big part of the cause of that family culture.  I remember him inviting me and actually wanting me to play with my older siblings and their friends.  The summer evenings were filled with playing shark  or rag tag in the pool together.  The games were instigated by Mike and he wanted me to play.  When it was time to sleep we would all crash underneath the stars on our huge deck with a blanket and a pillow.  He would invite his friend Horse over on the weekends and all of the siblings and Mike's friends would have a game after dark of capture the flag on our 5 acres. For some reason he wanted me to play. It was more fun for him to have all of us there.  My parents would take us to go on beach trips in the summer.  All of the kids that were old enough would go out in the waves together.  I remember treading water to be able to catch the swells with him.  I just wanted to be around him so much and I felt so grateful that he always wanted me.  For some reason every thing was more fun for him when I was there.  He wanted to to go on the Great Dipper at Santa Cruz with the older kids.  He made my life so fun.  He always loved Christmas and helped to make in magical for his younger siblings.  We would pile onto the floor on Christmas Eve night with sleeping bags.  We would have conversations about what we hoped that we would find under the tree in the morning.  The conversation was interrupted by Mike hearing Santa's bells or seeing him whiz past the window on his sleigh.  He had me fully convinced.

I love Mike and I have realized more and more how magical he helped to make my childhood by including me, by playing with me, and by loving me. I looked up to him.  I loved watching him win his basketball games and receive awards for how outstanding he was in academics as well as sports.  I know his excellence has had a huge impact on my life.  It nagged at me.  I told myself again and again that I had to be smart and excellent too because I was his sister.

Well, that was a tangent.  But, all of those thought were running through my mind as I went to the zoo today with my husband and children.  We had a fun day.  And instead of me despairing over the challenges of such an age gap between my children, I saw something different.  I saw an oldest son that  found joy in making the younger children happy.  I saw that age gap as being the same amount between me and my oldest brother.  And I was filled with hope.  I felt like Tom Hanks on Cast Away.  I wanted to turn to Mark, like Tom Hanks turned to Wilson after so many hardships on the island, and say, "It could work!"My family liked each other today! It could work!  I have hope!

The best part of the day is to see how peaceful  and content Mark is.  I believe that this has come from getting a job offer that he is really excited about.

The night was lonely and I got bored, but Master I watched a movie with me and proved to be such a companion. We watched Love Comes Softly. Master I gasped at all the right parts and enjoyed it right along side of me.  He even turned to me and asked me if I believed what one of the characters said.  He was referring to the line, "Sometimes love isn't fire works.  Sometimes it comes softly."  I told him I though it was true.  He said that he thought it must be true too.  I am sure I wouldn't seek and appreciate Master I's companionship like I do if that need was always met for me.  So, in the end, even that was a great blessing.