Baptism

What a long way we have come with our oldest boy. Almost ready to be baptized. There was a while that I thought that he would be the first child in the Church to refuse to be baptized when he turned eight. I probably thought that because he repeatedly told me that was the case.

The first time that I remember him strongly saying that he wouldn't be baptized was when he was four years old. We had plans to go to visit his cousins that live about an hour away. Right before we were about to leave a friend called with a very heavy heart. I don't remember the details, but I remember telling Master I, "We still get to go to our cousins and we will spend the night, but I have to help this friend for about an hour."

He responded angrily, "You do not have to, you just want to. It isn't a need, it is a want."

I disagreed with him because I felt like this was something that I really needed to to do. So I explained how I felt, "We will just babysit for Jenny for an hour and we will still get to play with your cousins for a long time. But, I feel like this is a need because I promised Heavenly Father I would do this when I was baptized. When I was baptized I made a promise that I would mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort."

Still angry, Master I yelled at me, "Well, I am never making that promise!"

I decided not to pay too much attention to his promise he made and hope that he would forget it, but he reminded me over the next 2 years that he wasn't going to get baptized. I was justifiably concerned because I had seen how determined this little boy can be.

Then when he was about seven he had a major concern about tithing. I explained to him that he couldn't get baptized if he wasn't willing to pay tithing. I think more than anything I wanted to test the baptism waters from a different approach to see how he was feeling about the whole thing, if he was still stubbornly sticking to his resolve to never get baptized. He was. He said, "Yah, I am not getting baptized."

That didn't work, but he still wanted to talk about his concerns about tithing. This boy has always really loved money and the power that it brings to do what he wants to do and give want he wants to give. It isn't that he is selfish. He frequently wants to take me to lunch or buy things for people, but he likes to have control of his money and 10% seemed like a whole lot of money. I had aldeady in previous conversations tried many times to explain to him the reason we pay tithing. I taught him that tithing money didn't pay anyone for working in the Church because none of us get paid for our work that we do. I taught him about the tithing being an opportunity to put the Lord first in our loves above our blessed money. I taught him that it was an opportnity for us to show the Lord our faith and for him to "open the windows of heaven" for us. I shared with him my life's experiences of how the Lord had blessed me "more than I had room to receive." But, none of that seemed to penetrate him. So he asked that day, "Why does God want me to pay tithing?" I knew I had already explained those things so I thought I would try a different approach. In exasperation I blurted out, "Because He wants your money!"

That was one of my less-effective teaching moments. But, I was hurt. I took it personally that my little boy didn't have the faith of a child when I had worked so hard for that. Needless to say, he didn't like my answer. He blurted back at me with just as much fury, "Well, He can't have it! I am never paying tithing!!!"

The explanation that finally opened his heart to paying tithing was an odd one. I told him the story of a boy that hated to pay taxes. His dad soften his heart by the telling him all of the things that the government paid for and asking him which of those things he would like to give his money to. The list included bridges, roads,defense, schools, and national parks. My boy frowned at all of the list except for the last one. He said, "National parks! That is what I would choose!" We did a similar thing for tithing and then he agreed to give it a try. I guess it was something about being able to choose.

Somehow his heart softened to the idea of being baptized as well. I was afrad to ask him about it too often because I didn't want him to repeat over and over again his determination that he wasn't going to to do it. I was just hoping that he would forget. One day I noticed that he talked about finishing the Book of Mormon lke his cousins Jacob and Eden before he got baptized. I tried not to look too excited or suprised.

Amazingly, he did finish The Book of Mormon before he got baptized. He also memorized the 13 Articles of Faith and we tried to teach and inspire him from the time that he was just a baby.