Family Update

Isaiah opened up his own restaurant on Saturday morning underneath the desk. The chess table was the cashier's register.


 His sign was inspired by all of the awards at Cafe Rio.

I love these creative, spontaneous days of childhood.

A conversation I overheard between Isaiah and Rachel:

Isaiah: "So, my most beloved sister, how much money are you making these days?"

Rachel: Pauses because she is puzzled, then answers honestly, "I don't know."

Isaiah: Rolls his eyes and turns to me to ask, "What should I tell her to say?"

Mandy: "I don't know if we should teach her what to say because it is actually considered really rude to ask someone how much money they make. But, did you know that in Japan there is a city that it isn't rude? That is actually how they greet each other. Instead of saying, 'Hi, how are you doing?' They say, 'How much money do you make?'"

Isaiah: "Ahhhh! Can we go to Japan?"

That boy loves money.

Mark's Birthday

Isaiah wanted to give something really good to his dad.  What he settled on was giving his dad all of his money so that they could go out to dinner together. It is so important to me to celebrate our birthdays in our family. Every year Mark tries to get out of it, but I tell him it isn't for him, it is for our family.  It is for our kids.  Give them a chance to express their love  and you have given them a gift. I want to creat a family culture where we celebrate and show love for each other.

Rachie Rach was crying to me that she needed to call her Grandma. She said, "My Grandma needs me! Her misses me!"

When we were leaving Granny Wilcox's house last week. Rachel turned to Isaiah and said, "Her is really nice. Granny is really nice."

For Rachel's bedtime story I told her about her upcoming birthday. She is going to have a tea party with her cousins. I told her about what we were going to do and who was going to come. But she soon started to ask if her imaginary friends sere going to go like Squirrel Nutkin and all her letters (from the Letter Factory). Then she asked if her grandparents were going to be able to come by saying excitedly, "And Grandma?! And Grandpa?! They are my best friends!" I don't know what it was that we did to have Isaiah and Rachel feel that there was no better friends than their grandparents and their cousins. Maybe we didn't do anything at all. Maybe it was just natural. However it happened, I am so grateful for it.

William is walking!!! He is 10 months old and has just learned to stand. Right after learning to stand he tried to take steps and hasn't stopped since. No coaxing from me, no two parents on the ground to try to walk between. He just did it on his own. He has fallen many times, but he is totally undeterred.

Family Update

Master I has started playing basketball through a league for kids his age called Junior Jazz. Mark has been playing basketball with Isaiah about once a week teaching him drills, skills, and just playing with him. Mark has marveled at how different Master I's temperment is in this setting. Heis grateful for any teaching and any correction and he tries as hard as he can. He doesn't see Mark as his enemy, but rather as his great helper. He is constantly telling me how awesome his dad is at basketball. He will say to me, "Wouldn't it be awesome if I could be my age and have Dad's skills and knowledge about basketball?" I had an experience with Master I that shows his total humility, desire to be taught, and willingness to do whatever he is told on the basketball court. Mark has taught him how to play defense by gaurding his opponent. He sticks to his opponent like honey. He is really good. But, we noticed that he didn't know where the ball was because he had is eye on the guy that he was gaurding. Mark tried to correct him by telling him that while it was really good that he was keeping an eye on the guy he was gaurding, that he needed to be looking at the ball out of the corner of his eye so that he always knew where the ball was. So Master I tried the drill again. I was the one holding the ball and Master I was trying to guard Mark. Trying to implement Mark's counsel he turned his face to me instead because I had the ball. But the next part was the part that killed me. When Mark said "out of the corner of your eye" of course he was meaning in the periphery of your vision. But, Master I didn't know what that meant. So he tried to look at me, the ball holder, out of the corner of his eye. His eyes were pointed up and in the right hand corner. He had to have his face turned sideways so that he could still see me out of the corner of his eye. I started laughing so hard. If I want to make Mark laugh all I have to do is imitate that same look. Miss R's new thing is ballet. She loves to watch videos on Youtube and to try to imitate their moves. Here she is practicing her moves

Here Master I is making fun and trying to be a part of the pictures.

One of my New Year's goals was to take time to play with her everyday and read to her. I try to do this, but I get busy and somedays pass by without me doing this. I don't want to miss out on the joy that I can give her and the relationship that I know that I can build with her. Today for our play we got her babies dressed in new outfits, fed them bottles, wrapped them in blankets, and sang "Baby Mine" to them. Then we went to her play kitchen to make them food. We used play dough to roll out and cut shapes with little cookie cutters and then pretended to bake it in the oven. My little help in giving her ideas of what she could do was absolutely wonderful to her. She loved it. I loved her and loved my time with her today.

Master W's new found love is avacado and applesauce. He will eat sweet potatoes, pears, strawberries, blueberries, peas, green bean, rice, potatoes, and puffs. But, it isn't consistent that he will always eat those things. But, avacado and applesuace is a major winner. Following the advice of a friend, I buy the Costco bag and then when they are ripe I slice and freeze them. I am grateful that he loves avacado. His pediatric allergist recommended it to me because it is so high in fat and he needs other sources of fat since he can't have any dairy products.

Master W still loves to be held. When I am cooking in the kitchen he comes up behind me, grabs on to the back of my pants, and stands up. It totally traps me. I know that if I move he will fall. My only option is to hold him. I asked Mark to hold him once last week while I was cooking dinner. Mark suggested that I just put him on the ground. I thought to myself, "Yah, why do I feel like I have to hold him all the time?" But, then as the week went on I realized Master W's dirty trick of how he traps me. My wheat grinder broke this week when I went to grind wheat to make bread. I had mixed emotions. Actually, to be totally honest my first feeling was relief that I didn't have to make any more wheat bread. I told Mark the news. He wasn't nearly excited as I was. He loves homemade bread. It is a major staple in our home. I make it at least 4 loaves a week. I guess I should say used to...

Happy Birthday

Eventhough we already celebrated Master I's birtday earlier in the month, we couldn't let the day go by without celebrating so we had presents, fun activities, and a breakfast cake with candles for breakfast. Mark said this was the last year that we were going to celebrate any other day except for the actual day of birth because we always just celebrate twice when we do it that way.

We also got to be with Mark's mom for her birthday. I lover her. I consider her to be one of my best friends.

This is my last post of the Christmas break activities. My journaling about these activites made me feel so relieved. I felt like, "I did it!" We did Master I's classroom party, we pulled off our Christmas Eve family party, we gave some of our old toys to friends, we got the presents for everyone to make for a magical Christmas Day, we celebrated birthdays, we cleaned the house, we welcome family to visit us, we did the Christmas Day Sacrament Meeting program, we did Master I's baptism, we celebrated New Year's. It was challenging to do these things in addition to the regular cooking, cleaning, and nurturing of everyday life. But, I believe in all of this work. This is my job; these are my projects. The words that have come into my mind were from the General Relief Society President Julie Beck, "Families mean work, but they are our great work--and we are not afraid of work."

Of course right after I was finished typing this Master I came in and asked me a question to test me.

Master I: "You know that canteloupe that you cut up and put in that bowl. Did you need it for anything, because I just had a little of it."

Me: "Yah. It's for dinner so don't eat any more ok?"

Master I: "I ate it all."

Me: "You ate the whole canteloupe?"

Master I: "Just what was in that bowl."

Me: "That was the whole canteloupe."

Nevermind that I already gave him popcorn and a cut up mango for his snack. That homework can really cause hunger I guess.

Baptism

No one was invited to the baptism but his immeadiate family and Grandparents. I ashamedly left my brothers at my house saying, "I'll ask him again when I get to the baptism. Leave your cell phone on." Luckily he consented to having them come. My dad kept joking that he didn't want to do something bad that would make him get kicked off of the invited list. I was so reluctant to let him have his way in this, but he reasoned with me, "I want it to be small and spiritual."






What a long way we have come with our oldest boy. Almost ready to be baptized. There was a while that I thought that he would be the first child in the Church to refuse to be baptized when he turned eight. I probably thought that because he repeatedly told me that was the case.

The first time that I remember him strongly saying that he wouldn't be baptized was when he was four years old. We had plans to go to visit his cousins that live about an hour away. Right before we were about to leave a friend called with a very heavy heart. I don't remember the details, but I remember telling Master I, "We still get to go to our cousins and we will spend the night, but I have to help this friend for about an hour."

He responded angrily, "You do not have to, you just want to. It isn't a need, it is a want."

I disagreed with him because I felt like this was something that I really needed to to do. So I explained how I felt, "We will just babysit for Jenny for an hour and we will still get to play with your cousins for a long time. But, I feel like this is a need because I promised Heavenly Father I would do this when I was baptized. When I was baptized I made a promise that I would mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort."

Still angry, Master I yelled at me, "Well, I am never making that promise!"

I decided not to pay too much attention to his promise he made and hope that he would forget it, but he reminded me over the next 2 years that he wasn't going to get baptized. I was justifiably concerned because I had seen how determined this little boy can be.

Then when he was about seven he had a major concern about tithing. I explained to him that he couldn't get baptized if he wasn't willing to pay tithing. I think more than anything I wanted to test the baptism waters from a different approach to see how he was feeling about the whole thing, if he was still stubbornly sticking to his resolve to never get baptized. He was. He said, "Yah, I am not getting baptized."

That didn't work, but he still wanted to talk about his concerns about tithing. This boy has always really loved money and the power that it brings to do what he wants to do and give want he wants to give. It isn't that he is selfish. He frequently wants to take me to lunch or buy things for people, but he likes to have control of his money and 10% seemed like a whole lot of money. I had aldeady in previous conversations tried many times to explain to him the reason we pay tithing. I taught him that tithing money didn't pay anyone for working in the Church because none of us get paid for our work that we do. I taught him about the tithing being an opportunity to put the Lord first in our loves above our blessed money. I taught him that it was an opportnity for us to show the Lord our faith and for him to "open the windows of heaven" for us. I shared with him my life's experiences of how the Lord had blessed me "more than I had room to receive." But, none of that seemed to penetrate him. So he asked that day, "Why does God want me to pay tithing?" I knew I had already explained those things so I thought I would try a different approach. In exasperation I blurted out, "Because He wants your money!"

That was one of my less-effective teaching moments. But, I was hurt. I took it personally that my little boy didn't have the faith of a child when I had worked so hard for that. Needless to say, he didn't like my answer. He blurted back at me with just as much fury, "Well, He can't have it! I am never paying tithing!!!"

The explanation that finally opened his heart to paying tithing was an odd one. I told him the story of a boy that hated to pay taxes. His dad soften his heart by the telling him all of the things that the government paid for and asking him which of those things he would like to give his money to. The list included bridges, roads,defense, schools, and national parks. My boy frowned at all of the list except for the last one. He said, "National parks! That is what I would choose!" We did a similar thing for tithing and then he agreed to give it a try. I guess it was something about being able to choose.

Somehow his heart softened to the idea of being baptized as well. I was afrad to ask him about it too often because I didn't want him to repeat over and over again his determination that he wasn't going to to do it. I was just hoping that he would forget. One day I noticed that he talked about finishing the Book of Mormon lke his cousins Jacob and Eden before he got baptized. I tried not to look too excited or suprised.

Amazingly, he did finish The Book of Mormon before he got baptized. He also memorized the 13 Articles of Faith and we tried to teach and inspire him from the time that he was just a baby. I wish it was those things that I could say had the biggest influence on him. I hate to admit it, but I think that it was actually reading to him the historical fiction books based on the history of the Church called The Work and the Glory. We are actually in the third book right now. Something about how the book was at his level of understanding. Or maybe it was learning about how people responded negatively, positevely, or disinterestedly in the prophet Joseph Smith. Somehow he was able to consider what his own response would be after considering all of those options. Several times he said to me while I was reading to him, "Mom, I know it is true!"

A couple of weeks prior to his being baptized we were reading a story about Mary Pay Goble who crossed the plains as a young girl. The sacrfice of having her family members die and the hardships she faced were overwhelming to me. I was overcome. I started to cry and I wondered if I was ready to do that, though I made the promise that I would when I was baptized. My own self-doubt led me to wonder that if I didn't know I could make that promise, how could my boy be ready to make it? I asked him doubtfully, "Are you ready to make this promise? That you will stand as a witness of God in all times, in all places even until death?"

He responded in a serious, assuring tone, "I am Mom!"

After he got baptized we gave him an opporutnity to share his testimony. It was intersting to me what he choose to share in his testimony. I felt like it was really influenced by reading those books. He said, "When I went in that water to get bapized I just felt the Holy Ghost so strong I just know that Joseph Smith restored this Church and that the Church is true. Amen."

He said nother really sweet thing after he was bapitized while I was helping him get dried off and get changed. In a very excited voice he said, "I can't believe it. I can't believe it. It's just so awesome." I could feel his excitement, peace, happiness, and joy. I wanted to help him to recognize that it was the Holy Ghost that he was feeling. I decided that I was going to try to explain that to him by saying that the feelings of excitement weren't the same feelings of excitement of going on a rollercoaster. It was a different type of excitement. But, that joyful, excitement was a feeling that I have too when I feel the Holy Ghost.

I started by saying, "Isaiah, those feelings of excitement aren't the same as going down a rollercoaster..."

That was as far as I got before he interupted me saying, "They are so much better!"

I have reflected on that many times sense. Those feelings of excitement, peace, and joy that come as communication from God through the Holy Ghost truly are so much better than anything I have experienced in this world.

Happy New Year's

I wish that I would have done a more fun dinner for New Year's Eve. Em did a bonfire with foil-wrapped dinners. Kristen did cheese fondue and a chocolate fountain for dessert. I did three soups and wheat bread. Next year I am going to make a more fun party type food. But, we did do our tradition of telling each other what we wished for them in the coming year. I love this tradition. It is usually very sentimental, but this year my dad added a comical flair. It was making everyone laugh. Isaiah, who is usually so sincere, insightful, and heart-felt in his wishes for everyone, was trying to make jokes instead. By the end he left the room discouraged wanting to talk to me. He told me that he wanted to be funny and make jokes like everyone, but didn't know what to say. I remember having that experience again and again as #5 of 10 in a family of very funny people. I couldn't keep up, I was just too young. Sometimes it made me sad that I didn't have anything to contribute, but eventually I got used to basking in reflected glory and enjoying it.

Our Wishes for Mark

Dad said, “That global would cause some major climate change so that Philadelphia has San Diego weather. That climate change causes the city to prosper, so it secedes from the Union and becomes its own country without any debt. The Church prospers and there are way too many members for callings. Frank (our maintenance man in our on-campus housing) permanently resides in Philadelphia to come to Mark‘s beckon call with any home repairs. Grandpa Stoddard would become senile and he would forget about buying extra treats and toys. That the U Penn hospital would appoint Mark to make sure that no unnecessary medical procedures take place. That redevelopment would allow 15 acres to become available for Mandy to live in the country and not having a commute.”

Mom said, “That he has a good year and likes what he is doing and learns good things

Luke said, “That the next president outlaws all holidays.”

Isaiah said, “That he would eat more pop tarts, cheesecake and pumpkin logs.”

Matt said, “That the career you take will meet your financial needs.”

Mandy said, “I hope that next year’s education is everything that you have always longed for educationally and that you will be able to find joy in family life and be able to do well in your program.”

Our Wishes for Grandma Jean
Dad said, “Oh the gift the giver givest, to see ourselves as others see us.”

Mark said, “That you can look at all the things you have done in life, and get satisfaction from them.”

Mandy said, “That we can enjoy many spaghetti dinners with meatballs. That we can live close so you can play with Rachel, and that we can have many Lake Tahoe times. That you will have a peaceful heart. And, that we can go to arches together.”

Matt said, “I wish that you can continue to understand how much we appreciate you. That we can mutually increase our love.”

Luke said, “The happiest and most joyful year of your life, whatever that means for you.”

Isaiah said, “That you will be happy”


Our Wishes for Grandpa Stoddard
Mom said, “I wish that you get to see everyone that you want to see. I wish that we can keep doing things together.”

Mark said, “I wish that you will continue to take joy and have fun with you grandkids, within reason.”

Mandy said, “That you always may be able to spoil us. Lake Tahoe and arches.”

Matt said, “I wish that, if it happens, that the girl that I meet and love, will meet you and appreciate and love you for who you are, and your wise cracking.”

Luke said, “I wish that you can see and appreciate that you are the greatest example of strength, in the church and in life in general.”

Isaiah said, “I want to start eating ice cream. And that you will fall asleep before midnight”

Our Wishes for Isaiah
Dad said, “That every person that you meet in Philly can very quickly see you like I see you.”

Mom said, “That you can find a good piano teacher in Philly.”

Mark said, “That you can go on more hikes and climb more mountains. That you can have more fun playing basketball.”

Luke said, “That basketball becomes your greatest love after God and family.”

Matt said, “After your baptized that you continue to keep your covenants with Heavenly Father. And that you can feel the Holy Ghost more in your life.”

Mandy said, “That you will always love me as you very best friend, and that you will love the Holy Ghost as your second best friend, behind me. J


Our Wishes for Luke
Dad said, “That you are very soon helping with the grandchild race with the Halverson’s.”

Mom said, “I wish you another great school semester at BYU. I wish that you and Matt will continue to live together. “

Mark said, “That you will make progress figuring out your direction with a major. And that you will continue to enjoy teaching at the MTC.

Mandy said, “I wish that there will soon be a dance floor filled with grandchildren and much celebration, and you will quickly have children.”

Matt said, “My wish is that you at least have a girlfriend before the year ends.”

Isaiah said, “Same as Mark’s”

Our Wishes for Matt
Dad said, “I wish that you always see yourself as an ‘A’ person. And that nothing changes you and you stay the person you are.”

Mom said, “I hope that you can get into BYU like you want to and that you can have a great dating life, and that you have great friends here in Utah.”

Mark said, “I wish that you can keep enjoying school and follow your road that you are starting on and that you can find success in your education.”

Mandy said, “I hope that I can cook with you many more times. I wish that you will fall into some money and come to Disneyland with me and the kids. And that you will see the light with Michelle.

Luke said, “I hope that you can keep getting good grades and that you can completely understands who you are, and loves you for it.”

Isaiah said, “Same as Luke and Mark;s”

Our Wishes for Mandy

Isaiah said, “That we spend lots of time together.”

Mark said, “That you wont hate Philly has much as you could hate Philly. That William will stop screaming. That you will meet new friends.

Matt said, “That while you are in Philly your cooking and baking will bring happiness to those you meet.”

Dad said, “That you find a Philly school system that makes you so happy.”

Mom said, “ That you don’t like Philly enough so that you will consider California.”

Luke said, “That you can convince Mark to have more children.”

Our wishes for William
Mark said, “That he will come to terms with the fact that he can not always be held. Also, that he will decrease his drooling.”

Dad said, “That he continues to gain weight with a wider variety of foods.”

Mom said, “That he will have a decrease in allergies.”

Matt said, “I wish that as he goes into the transition that as he transitions to Philly, that he will continue to grow strong.”

Mandy, “I wish that William will have a lot of time to play with me and that he can feel lots of love from.”

Luke said, “That he will not have any allergic reactions.”

Isaiah said, “I wish he would stop falling down, and stop eating my legos.”

Our wishes for Rachel
Mark said, “That even with me as her dad, she can remain cheerful and happy go lucky.”

Dad said, “Heavenly time at Lake Tahoe.”

Mom said, “I hope that she gets to see Tahoe soon, and that she gets to get more hats.”

Matt said, “That she will continue to realize how special she is, and that she doesn’t let it get to her head.”

Mandy, “That she can have a lot of time to be with me and play with me. That she can be cherished by me.”

Luke said, “That she can keep her accent.”

Isaiah said, “That she wont spank mom anymore. And, that she will learn how to play piano.”

Merry Christmas

Christmas Eve Party

This year was our best year yet. We learned from past fiascoes that the first activity that we should do was to eat because hungry children aren't happy children. So the first rule was to eat the first thing.

We also learned that we (the moms) have to have all of our food prepared ahead of time because we need "our head to be in the game" when all of the children are together. We need to be running the activities and averting disasters instead of mixing sauces. So the second rule was no cooking at the house. Kristen further calmed chaos with planning. She invited all of the children in to sit down and watch a book reading on Christmas oranges. While the children were watching their book the parents were preparing the kid's plates of food. When the touching Christmas message was over the children were given their own Christmas orange and escorted to a plate full of food. Brilliant.

Our third rule was that we needed to do the things that we care about the most first because you never know how long the kids will cooperate before mutiny happens. So after the kids ran outside and played (forgive me for being grateful for global warming and our warmish Christmas in SLC) and after Mark did this dishes (his harden fast rule that the hostess doesn't clean the meal) we called the kids back in the house for the Christmas Nativity play. Now, Emily has enlightened me of the folly of putting costumes on children and expecting reverence and a spiritual experience. With my reduced expectations I thought it went fabulously well. Never mind the fight to be Mary from two of the youngest girls. Never mind that you can't get any of the older boys to be Joseph. They all wanted to be the sheep and cows, lay accross the floor, make lots of noise, and appear cool.

The Christmas play morphed into our talent show where the children could play their instruments. Looking back, I don't think that we got to see very much this year. We lost their attention there.

The children went and played while we prepared for the next activity...Christmas Bingo. Kristen even had wrapped presents for the winners. And they were all winners. Blue ribbon for the boy presents and green ribbon for the girl presents. Brilliant.

After that activity we had gingerbread cookie decorating. We have much simplified this tradition. No cake decorating bags, just bowls of frosting. It worked very well.

We ended the night with dessert.

All of the organization and planning made it possible for the moms and dads to enjoy one another's conversation. I had so much fun. It is so easy to let Christmas Eve go by with out really celebrating and enjoying the day. I will really miss my family that lives in Utah.

Da Sweetest Darling

Here is an update on the life of a little girl.

We went to visit Granny to love her and so that she could love us. She helped me finish a quilt that I have been making for Mark for the past two years. The quilt has different pictures stitched together with fabric that represent the first ten years of our marriage.



Here she is playing house with her brothers. Master I, a full five years older than her, is the baby. Either he got way too used to nurturing in those first five years or she is just a master nurturer.


My parents came for Master I's baptism. When they arrived the brought an entire bag full of Lake Tahoe books. This is her favorite place. I found it so amusing that she loved being read these adult picture books of Tahoe. My parents left a couple of days ago. She was very sad to see them go. She said in dismay, "They are going to my Tahoe?" then she cried as she watched their car leave.



Master I's baptism was one of the sweetest experiences of my life. Miss R could sense that it was special, but instead of responding with reverence, she was wired and took center stage. It was like she thought that her grandparents and parents, who were sitting quietly listening to the music before the baptismal service to begin, were there to see her perform. And perform she did. She got up in front and said, "Guys, I am going to teach you a lesson." She then pointed to each person and said, "You're a child of God and you're a child of God and you're a child of God." She said many other things that I wish that I would have recorded in the moment so that I would have remembered. The only other thing that I remember he talking about was the painting on the wall of the Savior. She was talking about how Jesus was modest and so was the baby. It was hilarious.

My dad loved it. He turned to me and said, "She's wired." Miss R promptly went over to him and said, "Shh. You have to be quiet. I am teaching a lesson."

In my defense, I was trying to persuade her to come sit by me and not make a scene. When I could see that it wasn't working I stood up to get her and make her sit by me. She then ran away from me in a circle around the room trying to get away from me yelling, "NO!" So much for not making a scene. I was glad that it was just family there.



She is there to be enjoyed if we take the time to enjoy her. This is my New Year's resolution--play with and enjoy her.



Today she couldn't fall asleep during nap time and started crying. I whisked her outside on our porch, that is off of our bedroom, to try to avoid her waking up her younger brother. She blamed the fact that she wasn't sleeping on not being able to close her eyes and not having any beesh (binky). We decided to enjoy the winter sun on the porch because it is 46 degrees in SLC today! I love it and so does she. She said, "It's warms." I started to laugh and kiss her neck and she thought I was too slobbery. She said, "Don't suck on me! You think I am a snack? I'm not a snack. You can't eat hair. It gets ruined."

She loved this dog that my cousin got for Christmas. It melted my heart to see her enjoy, pet, and nurture this little Pomeranian. That strong feeling in my heart as I watched her joy made me wish that I could indulge and buy her one. Sometimes money being restrained by money is a very good thing, because I don't want dog hair in our house.





She has been loving the Letter Factory movie. She calls it her letters. She now knows all the letters and their sounds.

As always, what touches me most about her is her mother heart. The other day she very gently touched me and sympathetically said, "You got sick? Your tummy got rumbled?"

She was borrowing a phrase from Pooh Bear, "I'm so rumbly in my tumbly."